Being Poor but Happy

Albatross says on Jan 17, 2005, 09:22:

Good Question After "Is there a God" and "What do women want", "What's important" has to be the oldest question in the book... and just as impossible to answer.

As an American, I've spent most of my life stuck in our uber consumer culture... where being poor but happy is NOT an option. But after living in Eastern Europe for years and numerous visits to the Caribbean and South America, I've come to the same conclusion... that it’s time to leave.

Unfortunately, the obsession with financial success is hard to banish, even for those people who seem to have it all; the world is full of millionares who still want more. The concern for money is insidious and becomes more so as women and children are considered. I’ve met a few women who would have probably married me in a heartbeat, but I’ve balked because in the back of my mind I’m not sure I could actually afford them if I brought them back to the United States. American wives are not cheap and raising a child here can cost literally hundreds of thousands of dollars.

In a futile attempt to answer your question, I deal with my current discontent by getting out of this country as often as possible for as long as possible while at the same time searching for another country (Colombia, La Republica Dominicana, Romania, Croatia... ???) that might work out permanently.

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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cremaster says on Jan 17, 2005, 09:54:

I think that Albatross nailed this one. It´s almost impossible to be both poor and happy in most Western (First world) countries. Everthing is geared around making people strive for a faster car, a bigger house, a hotter mistress. Unless you adopt the ´voluntary simplicity´ creed, move to the Kentucky hills and raise goats, you´ll just fall behind the strivers.
I´m giving serious thought to moving to Colombia permanently, working a little, and enjoying life a lot.
To answer your question about being poor but happy, the Colombians seem to rely on their families. Both to help with the poor part and to keep them happy.
Patrick

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Mr. Hollywood says on Jan 17, 2005, 10:46:

It's all about... It's all about reducing your needs/wants and increasing your means. Once that ratio is in balance, you'll be fine. Generally, people try to go about it backwards, by increasing their earnings to support an overblown lifestyle, while trying to fill some hole in their life with goods. But it's actually easier to simply question if you actually NEED all those things.

The mental trick I use when I find myself really wanting some material thing is to force myself to wait a week or a month. Most of the crap you want is a passing fancy, the result of either personal insecurity or waves of marketing madness washing over you. Wait and a while and you think, "Why did I really want that gold plated iPodr?"

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Mariangela says on Jan 17, 2005, 12:13:

So true! You guys are completely right. I think 99.9% of the people in the USA suffer from "Consumer fever", known as "consumismo" in Spanish. The whole social system is based on how much and how often people spend. People's happiness relies on how many trendy and new stuff they own, the great and extravagant Hummer they just purchased, their humongous house and all the expensive furniture they need to buy to fill it up, etc. There is a big void in people's life because of the lack of family unity, traditions and humbleness.
I know that most people in Colombia buy stuff when they NEED it, not when they are feeling down and need a fix. People in general are happy just hanging out with family and friends and enjoying the social life that Colombia offers in restaurants, Clubs, etc, that are affordable and charming.
My father, for example, fixes every appliance that break in the house. My parents have owned the same furniture for almost 40 years... They cherish what they have, treat it with respect and make it last. When they come to the States they can't believe how wasteful peoople are.

That is one of the reasons I want to go back to Colombia. I want my kids to know what is really important in life, value the gift of being around family and friends, appreciate the opportunities that life has given them, and grow to be grateful, generous and humble people.

Mariángela

Mariángela

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oldbongo says on Jan 17, 2005, 14:20:

hippies... are poorbuthappy....

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ixent (☼Travelguide writer) says on Jan 17, 2005, 15:12:

utopiacowboy says on Jan 17, 2005, 15:30:

What's important? LOVE.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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william_andrew_channell says on Jan 17, 2005, 15:35:

Bare essentials As long as I have enough money to buy the bare essentials in life (ie. a roof over my head, food, clothes, transport, beer, prostitutes and pay for Colombian work visa) I'm happy.

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lpdiver says on Jan 19, 2005, 19:28:

Lose the greed I have heard that in Africa they trap certain species of monkeys in the following way. They place a wine carafe in the jungle with favorite treats in them. The monkeys come daily to eat the food. They must carefully insert their hands into the carafe to get the treats. After a few weeks/days the trappers emerge with nets and scoop up the monkeys who are too greedt to release the food in their hands so they can remove it from the carafe. Probably B.S. but you get the point.

True life example...my wife. I met her and when we left Aruba to go to Colombia...everything she owned fit in three suitcases. Before she left Colombia, everything she owned neatly fit into one. She gave most of her possions to relatives. She is the happiest person I know.

"cook some rice!"

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isaactraveler says on Jan 19, 2005, 19:38:

Love is the most important thing. after love, the next most important thing is money, so you can buy weapons to kill the ones that you no longer love.

Stevens, this was a good question. I think we see many americans and europeans trying to leave this death trap of consumerism. I know that I cant be happy living on what I make right now ( in the US) yet I would be considered very wealthy by Colombian standards. Fortunately, money isnt the end all of Colombian life. A little music, a little fresh fruit, and a lot of sex is the way I want to spend my waning years.

Albatross, you are a very insightful fellow. I may have to kill you.

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stevens says on Jan 20, 2005, 02:41:

Albatross - We are in the same boat. I'm searching for my next country now. I've heard Croatia is very nice but I don't want to attempt to pronounce the language. I stick to easy-to-pronounce languages like Japanese and Spanish. It's funny - For my first seven or eight years outside the U.S. I thought I'd return there someday, but then I realized I never wanted to join the rat race again.
cremaster - Family sounds good. I'm getting tired of being alone. You've got to have someone to share it with.
Hollywood - Over the past year I've been fighting to lighten my material load, which ultimately did not fill up the hole inside. What finally broke the camel's back was realizing that I had to much stuff to leave Japan. What a ridiculous situation.
Mariangela - Beautifully put. muchas gracias
Tinto - Black coffee? Less tube, less internet. I take long vacations during which it's easy to stay away from the tube; I completely missed the Olympics while traveling around The Philippines, but once back in Tokyo, on went the computer and duuuhhh, hours and days go by. There's something to simple living. Desire is ultimately unqenchable because it breeds more desire. But just a little bit of saying no can do wonders. A small example - I used tomeditate and on days of periods of time when I would say no to something I didn't need but wanted, I was able to concentrate better in meditation.
ixent - good point. thanks
Cowboy - Ah, entonces, la mejor en la vida es gratis. quiero encontrar este amor.
William - That's keeping it simple. And you're honest.
lpdiver - OK, I'm greedy. what do I replace the greed with?
Isaac - That reminds me of an alternate version of the serenity prayer:
Dios, concedeme la serenidad para aceptar las cosas que no puedo cambiar, valor para cambiar las que puedo, y sabiduria para hide the bodies of those who piss me off. (Sorry, don't kow the last bit in Snanish.)
Joking aside, though, you've all been a great help. Since my original post I've come to a decision, a compromise rather. They say do something you like to do. I don't like teaching anymore, but I like to invest and make money, so I'm going to quit teaching, leave Japan, and live frugally off what I can make. And if I somehow make more than I expect, well i'll deal with that later. If I don't make as much, well, I've still got a few years' cushion.

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isaactraveler says on Jan 20, 2005, 04:48:

albatross here is another compromise I know that most people live for their vacations. Not sure how it works in Japan, but I know that teachers in Texas work for 9 months but have their pay spread over 12 months.

I would suggest you take your full summers in Colombia or whereever you decide to visit. Almost all of South America is about 1/5th the cost to live as compared to the US and probably much cheaper than Japan.

Much better to make the best use of your free time and still have the ability to save for the future. With all the advances in medical/health care and all the modern necessities in Colombia, the only thing missing is the chance to earn a living there.

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stevens says on Jan 20, 2005, 05:58:

Isaac As a part-timer at several different universities I get five months vacation every year. I've been living this compromise for a long time now - have great vacations then come back to the drudgery. The problem is I have never fallen in love with this culture and strongly doubt that I'll marry a Japanese woman. I want to move to a place where I'm happy to be year-round, maybe get married and start a family. I've never found anyone with a similar vacation schedule to share it with.

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